Feeling gross for no reason like a boss.
I think I’m in one of those moods where I FEEL like I need to have happy fluffy things told to me, but in reality I need something to break my heart so that I can stop feeling for a while.
I don’t know if I can stand to use Paper Man as a means to this end, again. It’s kind of the only sure-fire thing I know to use though. Where it won’t just torture me but never completely cut my nerves off from feeling. Argh. Fuck! I don’t want to do this! I just don’t want to feel this way anymore and it’s obsessive so I have to do SOMETHING to kill it. FFFFFFFFFF.